Long distance relationships: 16 ESSENTIAL TIPS & BENEFITS WHEN IN DOUBT OR CURIOSITY
Long distance relationships?! Now let’s be realistic for a quick sec. How will this EVER work? Seems quite impossible and tiring right? Everyone should know, a long distance relationship isn’t for everyone, however if you’re thinking of trying it out I must say it’s quite an experience. You should also know that it requires a lot of work, so get ready to work twice as hard. It’s one of those things you really have to be sure about and make sure you know what you’re getting yourself into. Now it’s not all negative. There are so many amazing things that can come out of this type of relationship. If you were a disney character, you would be able to get a magic carpet and see your boo any time you want but this is not the case unfortunately. It requires time and money. If you’re reading this and you are in a long distance relationship with a lot of questions and doubt, I am here to answer all your questions and to help you out! So, based on my own experience and knowledge, I hope to feed your curiosity with the benefits of a long distance relationship and tips on how to make it work. You are welcome!
Long distance gives you time to miss each other.
When you’re in a relationship with someone where you’re able to see each other all the time, sometimes can’t be so ideal. Seeing each other often or on a daily basis can make you become dependant on your partner and hold you back from growing and being independent. You get used to them being there and it just becomes another daily routine. I don’t know about you but I love the time I have with myself. It gives me more opportunity to grow as a person and learn more about myself. Think about it, when you haven’t seen your partner in so long, you miss the way they smell, the way they feel when their arms are holding you tight against their body. You fantasize about the butterflies you feel when they press their lips against yours. So when that day comes when you have to pick them up from the airport… How exciting is that feeling?! It’s like you’re living your Notebook moment.. running to them and jumping on them or hugging them. But seriously, back to my point. Missing each other can be a healthy thing in a relationship. You won’t take them for granted!
It gives you time to spend with your family and friends.
Being away from your partner can be difficult at times but this is a great opportunity to make some time for your family and friends. Go on a cute lunch date with your mom or your sibling, or even all together. Go to that party that you don’t really feel like going to because you feel like you won’t talk to anyone. Do things that are out of your comfort zone. It will make you want to call up your partner the next day and talk all about it! Share different experiences with one another.
Plan your day and when you will talk to your partner.
It’s hard to plan your day out and when you’ll talk to your partner because we all have jobs and things we need to take care of on a daily basis. It is super important to know your partner’s schedule and when you’ll be able to talk to them, especially if you’re in different time zones. Try to message each other throughout the day, and if you’re busy let them know! You don’t want to keep them waiting and wondering. Sometimes your partner will stay up super late just to hear your voice, so make sure that the communication is strong.
Always be POSITIVE. Get ready for all the negative opinions around you.
Ok so, yes. Long distance relationships are hard, but any relationship in general can be hard. I’m going to be very honest with you and say that 90% of people will judge, but that does not mean you should listen to them. You can accept their opinions, but at the end of the day who’s life is it? It’s yours! What’s good for you may not be good for someone else, and you’re the only one who knows that. Nothing in life is guaranteed and this is why we always have to be POSITIVE no matter what! Put it in your mind that anything may or may not work out, but it is still important to take chances in life! Only you and your partner know every little aspect about your relationship. You are the only ones who know whether the relationship will work or not. It’s up to you guys! It takes two to make a thing go right, right? Right.
Plan FaceTime/video call movie dates.
We are very lucky that video chats exist because in this case, it helps the relationship a lot. Being able to see your partner’s face, laugh, reactions, and emotions on a screen when they are so far away is definitely a great feeling. Watching a movie together is also a great way to share emotion with each other. Plan a night and which movie you two will be watching, and then grab some popcorn, get on FaceTime and enjoy! Make sure you enjoy every minute of these cute little dates. They really do make a difference!
Watch a TV series together.
When you and your partner have a show that you watch together, it can be a great topic of conversation. You’ll end up talking about the show for hours, and that conversation will lead to others. It’s a great way to keep the excitement going and share something that targets both your interests.
Always be honest about your feelings.
When something is bothering you, try to let your partner know as soon as possible. Holding in your emotions can cause outbursts later on the more they accumulate. Don’t forget, you and your partner don’t see each other often. You need to keep them up to date and let them be aware of what is going on. Communication is key, no matter how nervous you are to tell them something. The more you communicate, the stronger your bond will become. Even from afar.
Make a solid plan on when you will see each other.
Long distance can get kind of expensive depending on how far your partner lives. You and your partner should talk about where you’re at financially and make a plan on when and how often you will see each other. Try to bring this up in the beginning of the relationship so you don’t end up disappointed if this doesn’t turn out to be a realistic plan. At some point, one of you is going to have to move. That is also something else to bring up to your partner. It is important to discuss the future and where you see yourself living eventually. You don't have to decide right now, but it’s definitely something crucial to plan out! Who knows? Maybe at the beginning you both will have no clue on who wants to move or if you want to move elsewhere, but I do suggest making a plan.
Make each other laugh until you get six packs.
Making your partner laugh can be really satisfying and boost your happiness. Try to send random memes during the day or videos and short clips from their favourite comedian. Laughing together will make you fall more for each other. You’ll find yourself more attracted to your partner.
Look up some success stories and share them with each other.
Although long distance relationships can be hard to pull off, a lot of couples do make it work! There are so many articles written by couples who share their success stories, and it does feel pretty good once you read them. It gives you hope and a better sense of what you really want.
Be each other’s alarm clock in the morning.
Waking up in the morning super early to go to work can be tough, but when your partner is the one waking you up even though they’re like 7,000 miles away from you can really brighten up your day. Hearing their voice will give you motivation to make the best of the day, but it will also make you want to stay in bed and talk to them for the longest time! Point is, make it a habit to hear their voice in the morning and also at night.
Save your money (actually) and apply for a card that earns air miles.
Being in a long distance relationship can teach you how to save your money. When you think about how much you might have to spend when you see your partner, make a plan on how you will put aside that money. For example every pay check you receive, put aside a percentage that makes sense to you and your salary and don’t use it for anything else! Make a travel jar. Traveling to go see your partner can get expensive most of the time, so I looked into air miles cards. I was never really sure how they worked. I always knew that my mom had one so I asked her how it worked and also did some research. So this is how it works. You accumulate points on your air miles card by using your credit card when you shop. You can also apply for a travel credit card, which also helps you accumulate points. I’m still learning about how these cards really work, so here is a a guide on how to earn airline miles: https://lifehacker.com/a-beginners-guide-to-airline-miles-1592887319
Update each other.
When something really funny happens during your day, or if you have stories that you want to tell, share them with your partner. Share your emotions and your opinions. Update them on how your family and friends are doing and what you did during your day. These conversations will bring you much closer and build trust towards each other. You know what they say… sharing is caring!
Make plans for the next time they come into town.
Time away from each other can be difficult, but planning for your next get together can be quite exciting! As the days go by, countdown the days until you see each other. It will blur out the sadness you feel of them not being there when you want them to be. Just focus on the positive stuff! Also, make a list of things you will do together before they come into town. You want to be prepared to show them your city and go to the best places together.
Spend less time fighting.
We all know for a fact that every couple fights and it’s totally normal. When you think about your partner coming into town it’s going to cross your mind if you’re going to fight or not. Realistically, yes you will fight and it’s okay! Just make sure it doesn’t last so long… Think about the reasons why you’re fighting and help each other move past it. You need to cherish all the moments you have together and spend less time fighting, or else you’ll be wasting all that precious time being together.
Remind each other how much you love one another.
It’s a great feeling to be reminded that you are loved and appreciated, especially from so far away. You and your partner are showing each other that no matter what the circumstances are, you will remain to love each other no matter what!
Hopefully now you have a better sense of what it’s like to be in a long distance relationship. Just like every other relationship, it will have its ups and downs but this will be a test for both of you if you’re willing to make it work or not. If this person is truly the one you want, you will always find a way. So, my last piece of advice to you: be ready for all obstacles and stay positive. When there’s a will, there’s a way.